I’ve had a running theme for my birthday celebrations over the last several years: “My Favorite Things.”

Three years ago, I was obsessed with Cá Nướng, a Vietnamese roasted fish that’s as delicious as it is time-consuming to eat. Also, coming out of the pandemic, I craved connection. So, I invited a handful of my closest friends, gave each of them a prompt to introduce to the group throughout the evening, and we ate and talked for hours. It was magic.

Two years ago, I was very into mezcal and poetry, so I hosted a lively evening of impromptu poetry writing and reading inspired by the smells and tastes of various mezcals. As you might imagine, the night was full of belly laughter.

Last year, I was all about long walks and bucking the stubborn car culture of Los Angeles. So, I walked the full 25 miles down Sunset Blvd from Downtown LA to Malibu and invited friends to join me along the way. Each time they did, we talked about what made LA special to them. It was soul-filling.

I look forward to my birthday every year—not because I want to be celebrated, but because I love using it as an excuse to reflect on the themes of the last year and build those into an experience for others to enjoy.

A Category Is Not a Purpose

When it comes to crafting meaningful gatherings, Priya Parker is one of my inspirations. She says: “A category is not a purpose.” Too often, we think, “Oh, I have to host a birthday party,” and then go through the usual motions: cake, toasts, games or no games? Gifts or no gifts? But Priya encourages conveners to dig deeper, stating that every gathering should have a purpose and that a purpose should be “bold, sharp.”

In the coming weeks, there will be so. many. holiday. parties – both in our personal and professional spaces, IRL and virtual. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good end-of-year celebration. But when they all feel somewhat the same, they blend into one another, threatening to leave me feeling drained rather than inspired. The antithesis of what a celebration should do!

So, If you’re planning a team or company holiday or end-of-year gathering, let Priya’s provocation boost you. How can you go beyond the expected agenda and create something bold, sharp, and specific to the group of people you’re planning for?

Here are three prompts to help you get started:

1. Who is this for? What do I know about them right now? What do they need? What do they enjoy? How has this year been different from past years?

2. Why am I gathering them? (Hint: “holiday party” is not a why, it’s a what). What do I hope they feel? What do I hope they do as a result of this gathering?

3. How can I make this experience truly memorable? Consider:

• How can I create opportunities for meaningful connection?

• How can I engage the five senses?

• How can I create delight, surprise, and intention?

An Invitation to Plan Your Gathering With Us

At Ei, we’re so serious about building purposeful events that in a few weeks, we’re hosting a free workshop to guide you through a process to create a fresh, intentional version of your team’s end-of-year celebration. You’ll walk away with fresh ideas and a v1 of a holiday party plan (IRL or virtual!).

If you’re a learning leader, HR professional, department head, or team manager—or just curious!—join us on November 22 at noon CT to infuse new energy, creativity, and connection to your end-of-year gatherings.