April 20, 2022

Maybe It’s OK

Last week, I missed sending Wednesday Words. It was the first (unplanned) miss I've had in nearly a year. I was in Mexico for a friend's destination wedding, and I'd planned to pre-write a piece and schedule it. But several other travel things got in the way, and I didn't finish it before I hopped on my flight.

I told myself I'd write and publish it while I was away. But I was staying at a beautiful resort near the ocean. And I chose to prioritize some rest and downtime with friends.

At first, I was disappointed in myself. One of my favorite activities is writing, and one of the most important things I do as a leader of a learning studio is practicing the very things we teach: setting intentions, embarking on experiences, reflecting regularly. And yet here I was doing the very thing that frustrates me: saying "I'm too busy."

And yet, though no Wednesday Words hit your inbox last week, the world kept spinning. Nothing major broke. No one complained. And here I am, picking up right where I left off.

It turns out that what I missed wasn't sending Wednesday Words last week, it was giving myself a bit of grace.

Throughout every learning and career journey, there will be "misses." When those misses are made by someone on our teams, or in our communities, we've learned that the healthy response is a discussion, and eventually, letting it go. Depending on the situation, that act can be lengthy or complicated, but it's always worth it.

With ourselves, it can be far more challenging. Our mental voices have been programmed by decades of life experiences with various family members, colleagues, and various inputs. When we're unkind to ourselves, we're simply turning up the volume, amplifying the worst of those voices, and letting them play on repeat.

If we're not careful, those voices end up spilling onto anyone in our proximity in explosive moments. In other words, the way you treat yourself when you “miss” will impact how you treat others.

Instead, pause. Turn the volume down by reminding yourself how small you are, how much time you have, and how much more valuable kindness is than productivity or material success. You can even ask for help — one of the boldest acts of any kind.

Those small mindset shifts will impact every experience you embark upon. You'll feel more alive, and deepen your relationships with those you work and live with most closely.

In other words, maybe it's ok.

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