If you're like me, you've already read three newsletters about AI tools and capabilities today. So let's take a breather from that and talk about what it takes for humans to build trust with other humans.

Part of my role at Ei, stripped of the nuance, is to sell our programs and services to clients. And in this role, I have never sold anything without talking to a human first. Depending on their challenge, a client and I may talk many, many times before we ever sign anything.

In my own work, and I’d bet in yours, humans are still in the room with other humans in the moments that matter most. An AI tool can create a deck. It can format a proposal. It can draft the talking points for a conversation. It can't feel a meeting turn or see when a client's face changes. It can’t notice when a pivot is needed based on the mood in the room. And it's in those moments that trust is built.

At the end of the day, humans still say yes to humans.

Nobody Taught Us This

Many senior leaders rise in an organization without ever receiving formal training in the intangibles: presence, poise, building trust, reading a client. They pick up bits and pieces by watching others and by trial and error. But often, they watch the “client whisperers” (those team members who always seem to know just what to say and how to say it) in amazement. Over time, many of those leaders start to believe, “That’s just not me.”

When they make time to learn and practice these human-to-human skills, however, that perception shifts. Reading a room goes from something you either have or you don’t to something you can get better at.

Winning the Room

We get to see that shift happen in real time in our workshops. One of my favorite parts of our Winning the Room program comes in the first hour. Participants split into groups of three. They run realistic client scenarios, with one person as themselves, one playing the client, and one listening as the fly on the wall. The listener’s job is to hear three things: the facts, the feelings, and the needs underneath.

The fly on the wall is often the one who catches what the others missed: a pause, a shift in tone, the thing the client cares about but never says out loud. When you’re in a conversation with a client, those are the things that matter most. Your client might push for a faster timeline. Listen a little closer, and you may hear that what they need is a quick win to show their new CEO. Miss that insight, and you miss the chance to give them what they need most.

Why Human Connection Matters More Now

If every conversation with a client is a chance to earn another one, the business case for these skills is pretty clear.

But there’s one more reason human connection matters more now. In “the age of AI” we all know we’re living in (thank you, newsletters in my inbox), people on both sides of the table want something human. Clients want to be heard by someone who’s paying attention. Leaders want to feel good at their jobs. Practicing something you can get better at, in a room with other humans, is how “That’s just not me” becomes “I can do this.” And that changes how it feels to walk into (or log into) work.

Want to Try It in Your Own Work?

Register for our Reading the Room workshop on November 18th. It’s a no-cost taste of the Winning the Room program you just read about, and you’ll get to practice the listening skills from the fly-on-the-wall exercise. Bring a colleague or your direct reports along. The more, the merrier.